Put. Down. The. Phone... Confessions of a Creative Who Got a Little Lost

Seriously, put down the phone. (I mean, maybe read this first.) We read this advice everywhere. Honestly, I bet I could find this advice from a new online source literally everyday. So here's my story:

I was feeling drained. Like really drained, and anxious. I started to notice that part of it was feeling like I was "on call", like my day and thoughts could be interrupted at any time... and they often were. Curious, I checked out the "battery" and "screen time" tabs. I was spending upwards of 5 hours per day checking my phone. To top it off, it also said I was checking it 6 times per hour on average. Every 10 minutes? I was horrified, considering I have my phone off for much of my work hours that meant I was checking more than every 10 minutes some hours. How's that for confession-time?

I came across some of Russell Brands work on addiction, he talks about screen usage as one of the ways we try to manage our anxiety. Ironic, that I work as a counselor with youths primarily dealing with high levels of anxiety, and here I had uncnsciously fallen into bad habits. But here's the thing: none of us gets it right all the time!

Now to come full circle, I have also seen and experienced screen usage to be successful in helping a person manage their anxiety at times. For me, traveling is something I can find very overwhelming, triggering intense panic attacks at times. In these times, I find a couple of earbuds and a familiar show or movie can be a lifesaver - it helps me block out what's going on around me and relax. The familiarity is comforting, and I have something to focus on that is not overwhelming. Just a little plug for screens not being all "bad" all the time... but I digress.

So I used the "screen time" tab to set limits for myself, and I'd like to report the results. I set a 2 hour limit on my "social networking" and a "downtime" from 10pm-9am. In the past couple weeks since doing this so much has happened that's worth talking about:

- I significantly changed my morning routine: I make a hot drink, water the garden, visit with my husband without distraction, snuggle my dogs, meditate, and... wait for it... read actual paper based books!

I frigging LOVE books.

I don't think I'd forgotten this, but I couldn't seem to find the time to read them. I've read some really cool ones, that I'll share with you in a bit.

- I started writing my books again. One is a workbook for Late Discovery Adoptees and Adoptees, the other is a fiction story that includes some really interesting fable-like qualities. I'm finally moving forward on these and looking forward to sharing them with the world. I suppose this is screen time too, wow, I've busted myself again, but this is selective, productive, creative, and makes me feel good!

- I've stopped feeling like I'm on call, multi-tasking with vastly divided energy.

- I'm getting outside more, and to the gym.

- I'm reaching out to actual real, live people to go for coffee or spend time in nature or just get together to do nothing.

- I started blogging again... I know, technically, screen time, but starting a expressive arts blog is something I've been meaning to do and been putting off.

- I've been enjoying cooking... well, sometimes.

- The biggest difference is I've got my creative back! This. Is. Huge. because creating is how I process the world and manage my anxiety. I support others in learning how to do this, and find so much joy in it, but somewhere along the way I kind of got feeling kind of burnt out on art. I spent so much time in my studio supporting others... but it turns out that wasn't the culpret. Once I cut back the screen time, my artist-self was happy to return!

I guess my biggest learn is that social networking was my "drain", because I'm still on screens a fair bit, but feeling more present and deliberate in my life. I love writing, reading and researching. I LOVE binging a good series with my kiddos. Since making this shift, my anxiety is down and my creativity is up!

Below are 2 fantastic therapy books I've discovered during this challenge:

This one looks like it's for kids, and I suppose it is... but actually, it's for everyone. I would call it an expressive arts book because the pictures tell the story as much or more than the words do. It's a story of loss and fear of vulnerability. Really so good and relatable. We need more books like this one.

This is intended for teens and their parents. It's about a girl who journies with anxiety, and some of her complicated family history. It includes some great basic grounding skills, and I could see it being helpful for families waiting to get into therapy or who have young ones who are nervous about going.

So welcome to my expressive arts blog! Here, I will share some ideas and projects you can try yourself. I'll share pictures of my own work and talk a bit about my process. From time to time, I'll get a little parent-y, and share what's working or not working in our home school-y world. I may even invite you all to do a challenge here or there.

 

So here's your first challenge: Let's call it... Put Down the Phone. If you've been feeling lost, anxious, or drained, check out your screen time tab. See if it scares the bejeezus out of you, as it did me. Spend a few days noticing what's happening for you just before or after you indulge? Are you feeling unsettled? Empty? Anxious? Has checking a screen become habit? Play with setting some limits for a week and see what happens! Feel free to share in the comments below :)